Tag: personal

Rules: answer the questions in a new post and tag 10 followers you want to know better!

I was tagged by the lovelies @h3llcat , @darthkylorevan and @callmelyss wehhh thank you! ❤

Age: 37

Birthplace:  Atlanta, Texas (Yes, there is an Atlanta in Texas)

Current time: 8:48 am

Drink you last had: Water

Easiest person to talk to: @nerdherderette , @h3llcat , @hollyhark and my bff at work, Chelsie, who I’d probably go crazy w/o in the office

Favorite song: Echoes, by Pink Floyd

Grossest memory: Ummm…I couldn’t say. I’ve blocked it out, whatever it is.

Hogwarts House: I’ve never read the books or seen the movies.

In love: Nope

Jealous of people: I’m actually not. I thought I was jealous of someone for a while, but then realized I was just resentful because they enjoyed a lot of success but were actually an awful person behind the scenes. Sucks when crappy people get rewarded.

Killed someone: I spent 8 years destroying the Free Peoples of Middle Earth on my warleader in Lord of the Rings Online PVP. -flex- 

Love at first sight or walk by again: I’m too ensconced in my protective bubble to ever notice this sort of thing.

Middle name: Michelle

No. of siblings: I have a half sister and a half brother. I’ve never met my half brother, and haven’t talked to my half sister in many years. 

One wish: To go back and slap the crap out of old me for all the stupid stuff I’ve done that amounted to me wasting a good 10 years of my life.

Person you last called: Non work related, it would be my mom.

Question you are asked most: ‘Did you have a good weekend? or ‘What did you do this weekend?’ which is the go-to question at work.

Song you last sung: I woke up this morning singing “We Built This City” by Starship for some reason.

Time you woke up: 6:15 (Thanks a lot, you stupid cat that won’t shut up!).

Underwear color: Oh my god. 

Vacation destination: I’m absolutely determined to go to Bora Bora. I looked at a picture of it once and then I played Dead Island (zombie video game) that looks like it was set exactly there and I just…need to go.

Worst habit: Catastrophizing. I’ve made that into an art form.

X-rays: Chest X-ray. Diagnosis: Panic Attack

Favorite food: Pizza 

I tag whoever hasn’t done this and wants to.

Had my cat for 3 days and he’s in the pet hospital for unknown illness. Very sick. Vet bill already $1800 and getting higher. I think the universe doesn’t want me to be stress free. I need my cat to be okay and I need to not be broke.

updates on updates

So, it took a solid week for me to even be able to look at a word document again after I deleted my last chapter of Gravity Well, but I’ve now started anew on C5 onward. I’ve moved everything into MS Word with a pretty teal background to keep me in a cheery mood, and I’m planning to finish this fic before I post it. Since I know where I’m going with it, I think I can finish it in a not significant amount of time if I maintain my sanity. 

I’ve also found I just cannot work on modern AUs and this fic at the same time, because I get my characterizations muddled. I can write multiple modern AUs at once, but I’ve learned this fic is a selfish bitch and wants all my attention. 

The next project will be to finish Threshold. I’ve ordered myself a lovely art that I’ll post with the last chapter. -sob-

Then I’m going to tackle the rest of ‘i can see through you,’ which will wrap up part one with 3 more chapters and then I’ll have a new section to work on for their college years (but it’s all one very linear story so it will all go in the same fic). 

@pandalolli and I are trying something new with the Viking fic (Out From The Well of Destiny), in which we are re-rping the ongoing chapters, which I’ll touch up and post. This will probably be the only updates that I’ll have online for a while. 

After THAT, I have another AU in my head that won’t go away, so. The wheels keep turning.

Thanks to everyone that has been kind and supportive. I estimate I’ll be back to posting fic around May? I’ll still be around in the community reading fic, commenting on things, and staring at art with hearts in my eyes. Feel free to come chat with me.

Love ya’ll!

So, since TLJ, I’ve gotten some of the rudest, most self-righteous and entitled comments on my stuff, the first nasty anons I’ve ever gotten (luckily), and I told myself the next time it happened I was taking a long break. So, here we are again. I’m sorry to all you folks that have been disappointed by me, that I’ve bored, that have found my work uninspiring, and I’m thankful for the ones among you that didn’t feel the need to tell me that personally.

The rest of you that have been kind and supportive far outshine those experiences, but I have had enough for now. I am going to go back to what I did before fandom, which was write for myself and write because I love it, not because I want people to like it. I’m not sure what that will mean in terms of updates. Probably will not happen until I’m finished with the fics. I will finish them.

I’m sure this sounds like drama. Sorry. I’m not having a mental health crisis, I’m just Over It.

P.s. I’m not personally leaving the fandom. Just not busting my ass working 20 to 30 hours a week to produce fic so I can feel like crap about it.

Hello!

Just want to say hello to the new folks I’ve seen pop up recently! It’s nice to see new faces (icons?). Feel free to say hi, send a message, yell about Star Wars with me, ask questions, etc. I don’t bite, don’t judge your ships, and am excited to make some new post-TLJ friends. ❤

kyluxtrashcompactor:

Keep reading

I want to thank you folks that have sent sweet messages. I feel like an asshole not responding, but I have no energy to keep up with much. I know I’ve posted some stuff in the past about the mental health challenges I deal with, and they are just neverending. I felt better for a while, and then I crashed and burned, which my CNP says is just a challenge of treating bipolar disorder. 

On a good note, I did meet a fantastic woman to help me out, who actually spent an hour with me asking questions and confirmed my diagnosis – which is actually really comforting even if I’m hearing it’s incurable, which it is. I have to avoid social media right now because I fall apart about everything – even stuff that might seem minor and silly, and I have had to delete a bunch of crazy late night posts lately and I just… can’t do that. It adds a burden of guilt and shame to my experience. 

I really appreciate and love you guys. You’ve been my family for nearly two years, and I hope we stay that way. If I don’t get back to PMs, it’s not because I don’t care, it’s because I just can’t talk. I’m trying some new meds (I hate the medication experiment so much) on top of the one that has really helped with my anxiety, so I hope I can kick this face-melting depression. 

I am working on my KBB, and I still intend to update my stories. I may be slow, but I love them. 

Thanks for being my friend on this dramatic Odyssey. 

hi friends!

just wanted to stop in to say that even though I’ve not been around much lately (lots of intense real life changes for the good happening!), I still love all you guys! I’ll be around more when things even out. 

also, the new installment (Threshold) of my Structural Fabrications series will be out, I’m fairly sure, this week. maybe even in a couple of days. 

So, I have my glitter on, and I am sitting in the doctor’s office to get back on my meds for the first time in a year. Just overheard at reception : It’s Star Wars Day! I forgot my poncho! 🙂